Telling you about my first time

all's well that inks well

all’s well that inks well (Photo credit: b1gw1ght)

Today starts the first week of my break between classes. I have three weeks to do nothing resembling anything academic. Just me and my computer, television, and maybe a few good books. As soon as my new book arrives, I’ll begin to read it for next month’s book review.

Of course I’m going crazy, obsessing over what my grades will ultimately be. So far it appears as though I’m going to pull straight A’s, but it’s not definitive. As soon as I know I’ll drive you crazy with my pathetic display of self-congratulatory behavior. I’m stretching as we speak to give myself a hearty and well-deserved pat on the back. I don’t want to pull anything as I contort myself awkwardly.

But while I wait, I did something last night that I’ve been toying with for a long time, but finally worked up the nerve to do; I submitted a short story for publication. To be honest, I think this rates higher on my “Hurray!” scale than my grades so. I finally did it!

Okay, I know this doesn’t seem like too big a deal. People submit short stories, essays, and novels everyday. What is a big deal, at least for me, is that I pushed myself out of my comfort zone. I sent my first submission. Now all I have to do is wait the appropriate amount of time to receive my first rejection.

Hey! Think positive! Yeah I can practically hear you screaming at your computer screens. I am thinking positive. I’m thinking I’m going to hear a response. Joking aside, although I really do hope they decide to publish it for me, I’m okay if they pass on my piece. I think I expanded my boundaries just by filling out the form and sending my story “Letting Go” to Agni Online. Everyone has to start somewhere and this is my start. And if they do reject it, I’ll send it to another site. Try, try again, as they say.

I’m also working on a short creative nonfiction essay that I plan to submit to Hippocampus Magazine. My essay chronicles my struggle with depression after the turmoil of my divorce up to leaving my job and spending a year unemployed. It’s set on my first day back to school, thirteen years after I dropped out. It’s nowhere near completed, and I’ll probably obsess for a few weeks before I submit it, but we’ll see where it takes me.

And finally, I still have to finish my rewrite of my novel. Once I’m done, I can evaluate where I am there. I’ll probably have to do another rewrite (and then another) before I’m satisfied letting this one out into the world. As you can tell, I plan to spend a good part of my time off writing. I let my classes get in the way of writing so I have a lot of time to make up. Then my last class will start next month and I may temporarily lose track of writing again, and that’s okay. By July I should be done and then I’ll be able to move forward in my life.

Hopefully I’ll also have a published story to go along with my sheepskin. I hope, I hope, I hope!

In the home stretch

sonoma coffee cafe

sonoma coffee cafe (Photo credit: justonlysteve)

I never got around to writing yesterday. Shame on me. To be honest, the next few weeks are going to be a bit hectic for me, so finding a free moment to share my wackiness may prove difficult. I many miss a few posts here and there.

I’m in the last weeks of the semester. I have two weeks of class and then finals the week after, and then I’ll be done. After that I’ll have three weeks off before the start of the summer, then I’ll really be done

At the same time, It looks as if my new temporary job is starting to finally give me some hours Not enough for me to afford anything, but enough for me to feel the pinch of time. So yeah, I’m probably going to feel exhausted as I lose all time to myself these next few weeks.

It’s only a short-term sacrifice. I have to keep reminding myself that this is short-term. It’s a little more than two months until I’ll be done. I can do this.In the mean time I’m still rewriting my novel, and it’s a significant rewrite with some major changes, project is due Thursday, and I have a portfolio to put together for my Creative Nonfiction.

What has me really worried is that I need to line up a permanent job. The job I have is not where I want to be. To be honest, it’s a bit of a regression for me, a step back into a career path that’s ill-suited for me, and frankly pays like crap. I know money isn’t everything but to deny its importance is stupid. Let me illustrate this concept in a manner I think will understand. I have bills to pay. I need a car. I want to have my own place again to do what I want. And I wouldn’t mind being able to afford to go out now and again.

So although my present state is short-term, I really need to focus on the long-term as well. If I don’t, I may be stuck here and likely will fall into my depression all over again. I really don’t want to start on that course again, especially now that I’m feeling a little better.